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Casino dealer memes | Work humor, Vegas quotes, Work memes
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"Indians are Cheap" - Russell Peters - Red, White, and Brown

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How to Treat Casino Dealers, According to Casino Dealers

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be the office clown? Make going to work fun with these office friendly jokes. I supervised an employee who had a negative view of everything I did. If I took a.


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A big list of casino jokes! The third day he does the same and the dealer asks him what his job was so he could afford to lose so much money and he says that​.


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"African Names" - Russell Peters

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Casino Workers Share Craziest Moments (r/AskReddit Top Posts - Reddit Stories)

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“We all did,” testified Johnson, when asked if jokes were told and things were thrown around during third shift. having seen Kelm sexually harass any other third-shift female worker and, He was asked if he had invited Morgan to a casino.


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What it's Like Being a Casino Dealer

Casinos attract characters—for better and for worse. After a few consecutive losses, his mood turned, and he threatened to throw a metal ashtray at the dealer. For years, I've worked with surveillance for cruise-ship casinos. I used to be a casino receptionist in Bucharest. Yellow ticks mean one of two things—you're either a high roller or an aggressive cheater. A customer came to the roulette table and spread his money across two-thirds of the numbers. It was all very glamorous and the owners were expecting a lot of cash to be thrown about. Once it had dried up, the money was straightened out and put right back into play. Before long he'd lost all his winnings, which didn't go down well. The men were staring at me confused; one even asked if I was a beginner. When I returned to ask if he'd also like a drink, I saw that the guy had rammed his hand down his pants and was fiddling with his junk. Security bolted in and managed to drag the guy out. Back in , I was working at the opening of a casino in Bucharest. Having been asked to calm down, he was switched to another table, where he tried the same tactic of ridiculous spread-betting across the numbers. Fair enough. I'd been preparing for the grand opening for five months, but I couldn't even spin the wheel. He grabbed the money before the dealer could take it and started running. Five minutes after the doors opened, three men sat themselves down and handed me a massive wad of cash to change into chips. Without thinking twice, the guards put them straight back on the roulette table—all crumpled and soggy. Upon hearing what had happened, her partner requested to be moved to another room immediately. The maddest of which happened in a casino in Nairobi, Kenya. This got me a bit flustered, but I tried to collect myself for the first spin. Some players are a bit paranoid—that's just the way it is. Right as I entered the room, I saw a security guard holding the staff door open while my manager was yelling at the dealer to run for his life. I waited patiently and then went to get his order. The fact you can sail a yacht in a straight line from Colombia to Sydney is just one part of the story. He was allowed to play, but only on the condition that I notified the security staff. I tried to shrug it off by making a joke about using too much moisturizer. You also need to be able to react to situations quickly and keep a smile painted across your face even when you're talking to dickheads of unfathomable proportions. He clocked it pretty quickly and asked her what had happened. I'm sure he was sober—he'd stuck to soft drinks all night—and he didn't seem like he was on anything stronger. Every time the wheel spun, the guy put his hand in his pants and had a right old fiddle. I haven't a clue what happened to the guy, though. This woman was cleaning up; she'd already won a few thousand dollars. You took my money and you're just laughing at me, right? One day, this massive guy—almost seven feet tall with a beer gut to match—decided to kick off at 8 AM in the morning. For instance, some will only make bets with their left hand, while others start swearing or chanting little mantras before placing a bet. I thought I was hallucinating, but it was obvious that everyone around me had noticed it, too. I gave it another spin but the exact same thing happened. A lot of gamblers have various superstitions and routines that they religiously stick to while betting. As the "eye in the sky"—the guy who watches the security cameras all night—I've seen some seriously strange things. It was to ward off evil spirits, of course. With my hand trembling, I dropped the ball in but it flew straight back out and got wedged under the door to the kitchen. One morning at about 6 AM, the casino I was working in was empty except for one American woman playing the slots. I should've known he was trouble when he came in—he had this really intense look on his face. The COVID response is hitting clubs and businesses on Bourbon Street particularly hard during the time of year that dancers and workers make most of their money. The two tackled this guy and forced him to spit the cash out. He assured me that he wasn't a bad person, he just can't think straight when he's on a losing streak. Thankfully they laughed, and I slowly began to feel slightly more in control. He grabbed an ashtray and started trying to smash the camera with it. The chap had barely sat down before he started throwing massive sums of money around. I've never seen anyone move that fast, and I don't think the dealer looked back until he'd reached the kitchens. I feel a bit sorry for the guy; the people watching behind the cameras were pissing themselves laughing. Turns out it isn't quite as straightforward as it sounds. You're watching! When the dealer changed, so did his luck. A security guard cornered him pretty quickly, but as soon as he realized he didn't have a chance of escaping, he put the bills in his mouth and attempted to swallow them. Even though they know that myself and my colleagues are monitoring the TV screens. It turns out this guy was so pissed at losing that he managed to remove the top of the roulette table—which is incredibly heavy—and subsequently threaten to murder everyone in the room. He could have been either. I was pretty experienced at the roulette table, so my manager was counting on me to man that position for the night. But out of the blue, he started talking to the security team through the CCTV cameras. Apparently, a lot of seemingly sane people really lose it when they see their money going down the drain. The dealer called the cleaner and she came with an electric fan. As the waiter handed me the ball again, I noticed that half of the casino was looking at me, praying for me to fuck up. Pretty good odds, you'd reckon, but he lost anyway. That means dealing with everyone from gambling addicts certain that their next spin will make them rich to eccentric millionaires to tragic old men who bet their pension away a day at a time to opportunistic teens who put their last tenner on the blackjack in the hope of a few free beers. All the stress aside, you at least get to see a lot of weird and wonderful things. He stayed there for a while, won some money, and began to relax. I began sweating profusely. When I wrote my report, it took all of my strength to remain professional and not just scribble down "she took a massive crap behind the slots. He noticed the cameras were swiveling, and this just made him even more paranoid: "So now you are staring at me. This time, however, it landed at the feet of the drummer on stage. Things aren't like they used to be.{/INSERTKEYS}{/PARAGRAPH} People always say that "the third time's the charm," but that's obviously not true because the ball flew out and landed in one of the gamblers' whiskey glasses, splashing booze all over his tux. Anyway, we got the whole thing on CCTV. While waitressing in a Bucharest casino, a high roller asked me to bring him something to eat, but I could only do that after the wheel stopped spinning—otherwise I might jinx it, he said. I wanted to know if that was actually the case, so I called up a few friends of mine who work in casinos. Presumably that was the end of their holiday. I smiled and apologized as the waiter returned the ball. Everyone else in the room followed, just as frightened. Seemingly, it was his good luck charm. I once saw a man who would throw salt into an ashtray every time the dealer spun the wheel. When that became clear to him, he flipped. Obviously by this point, security came into the room. He was staring right into the lens and swearing, shouting about there being magnets in the balls, how it was all rigged and a massive joke. As a casino worker, you need to maintain incredible focus and remain completely alert while everybody around you is getting plastered. When the slot attendant came by to see how things were going, he smelled something dreadful. So, instead of just going to the toilet, or even calling the attendant, she went behind the slots, pulled her trousers down and laid one out right there. When he signed in to our computer, I noticed a yellow mark next to his name. I got six casino workers to tell me their best anecdotes. {PARAGRAPH}{INSERTKEYS}In my imagination, working in a casino consists of little more than watching people walk in, serving them a drink, then waiting as they lose a load of money and finally stumble out while trying to figure out what to tell their spouse. After, she sauntered back to the slots relieved—two meters away from her own shit—and continued playing as if nothing had happened. Each of the stories below is told by a different person. With a completely straight face, she feigned innocence and claimed she vaguely remembered that there was someone walking around back there. At some point she realized she needed the bathroom, but was convinced someone would steal her winnings if she left. Somehow he got back in and started begging me to let him play again and promised that he wouldn't kick off. Immediately, another guard intervened. He was placing heavy bets all over the table.